Going through infertility to get pregnant really has weighed on me…we are so blessed to be pregnant right now but it just seems like I am constantly worrying and wondering if this pregnancy will last or what if something goes wrong…I wish I could be the person who just lets things go and whatever happens happens but I am def not that type of person…I was feeling some sharp pains nothing excruciating or anything but I was in the shower and it happened I immediately look down to see if I am bleeding…I am sitting on the bed and I feel some pulling so my first instinct is to see if I am bleeding…I use the ‘evil’ google and it could be round ligament pain…since this is my first pregnancy I have no idea what any of this feels like and its just all foreign to me so it always leads me to the worst…will this ever end??? I take out my doppler twice last night since I was feeling antsy and wanted to hear the heartbeat which I did but I wondered why am I doing this to myself…I feel like I am torturing myself…there is nothing I nor the doctors can do at this point so I should just ride the wave and enjoy every minute but its soooo hard when you have done so much to get to this point…I dont want to knock a person who easily got pregnant but we went through extraordinary methods to be able to conceive so its almost like I feel that I “deserve” an easy pregnancy which I know makes no sense but I was just hoping for the negative thoughts…I want to be happy every day and not have to think about the what ifs but they seem to pop into my head every once in a while and I wish they would just leave and never come back…infertility really does a number on you and I dont think I can ever be that care free person ever again…I guess it really has changed me forever!!!
I thought this was a cool simulator to see what your body goes through when you are pregnant at various stages…I think its cool!!!
I want to say hello and welcome to anyone stopping by from ICLW!!!
This blog is about our infertility journey and how blessed we were to have conceived and even though we are pregnant I still consider myself an infertile… A brief history of our infertility journey… We’ve been TTC actively for 12 months, but we have not been actively preventing for years!!! I was diagnosed with PCOS at age 12 and my husband has rock star sperm.. We first started having treatments with my OB/GYN with timed intercourse & clomid, then we went to an RE and did 6 IUI’s which all failed. We moved onto IVF in June and that failed and now I am 13 weeks pregnant from our first FET cycle!!!
everything is perfect…we got to see the gummy bear which now looks like a baby… this was my first belly ultrasound which was sooo cool…no more dildo wand for me lol….the tech got a good shot but then she moved the prob and pressed down on my belly and he jumped…I will say he until I am proven otherwise since I think its a boy…and it was the funniest thing to see him move like that and then he wouldnt go back to the same position…we still got a good picture…we also got the results and the nuchal fold was 1.3 which is very good since they want it to between 1.0 and 2.5 and he said my blood results were off the charts in a good way…he said they stop counting after 10,000 so we are 1:10,000 for downs and edwards syndrome…we were sooo happy since I was a bit nervous about the results and the dr. said I have the bloodwork of a 20 yr old and I didnt need plastic surgery or anything lol…we go back in 3 weeks for the quad screen but he basically said that it will only make my results that much better and we will probably be in the 1:100,000 for chromosomal issues…so relieved that everything is ok and now we can share our pregnancy with friends & family…we plan on telling ppl on thanksgiving since we have a lot to be thankful for!!!